Texts

Two Thin Red Lines

***'
Forever seemed to be not long enough
Living her life as everyone would be jealous at
She decided that she didn't want to live anymore
no reason to live, no reason to die so she spoke
the duality in her sound of her words crashed deep into my heart
Never I had heard her speak so depressed
never I had suspected her to be suicidal... until that day
She showed me the scars;
two thin red lines across her wrists
the wounds not even healed
she cried and threw herself into my arms, crying
she was telling her misery while I held her close
too many things were done to her
too many things wrecked her inside
even though she knew that God had a plan for her apart
even though she knew that God would hold her under His wings
she decided to put the knife into her wrists
She knew that this was not what she really wanted to do
She knew that there were plenty ways out
She knew that taking her life would not solve the problem as well
But the wounds on her arm are real
the damage to her soul is real
questions rise up her head
'How could anyone still love me now
how can I ever look into my own eyes again?'
Standing there she cried over herself
But I knew this would only be the beginning
if the roots of her problem are not pulled out of their soil
while tears are rolling down her face she told me her story
always giving away the love to whoever needed it the most
but all she saw was horror and pain
the kind words she spoke seemed to never reach their goal
She stood always ready to help someone else
but while helping her friends around here she forgot about herself
Her happyness was slowly drained from her
The smiles on her face were still there and only those who really knew here
could see that they were no more than an automatism
and suddenly she broke
she didn't even see it coming, she didn't even understand why
but one evening here happyness was drained empty from her
All the good work she did seemed so useless
all so unthankfull
She had put out the light in her own life
simply expecting herself to be allright
she kept giving away herself until she was empty
but she didn't even notice
until that one night
then all crashed down on her
unexpected
different than she thought it would feel
cold
hard
all she heard inside her was to put an end to it
she agreed that something had to be done
but all she heard was to take that knife
now her wrists may heal in time
her inner self will never be the same
so she kept crying to cry out her inner pain
but before she could ever heal within
something had to change, so I told her
As you noticed, your strength does not last forever
giving away out of love is a beautiful thing to do
but always at a high price
that's what makes it so worthy
she looked up to me, wiped away a tear with her left sleeve
you really think so? she asked me
it sure sucked me empty, I never ever thought I would cut myself
So you need to re-fill your life again
I know a infinite source of living water,
one that will always bring you new life, but you'd have to take a step
A step that's well worth it
You cannot cary on living the way you did
nothing in this world is capable of filling up what you need in your life
you may search for it yourself but I know nothing will but this
an eternal source of living water will give you new life within - eternal life
Jesus offers you to be able to drink
To drink the waters that flow in the heavens
alone you cannot reach it
you know you cannot reach it
so admit to Him that you need His help in your life
He sacrificed himself so you don't need to,
your own death couldn't be enough anyway, you see?
Admit and drink for free
He'll smile and hand you all the water you need
he'll give you the water and you can carry on with life
She wiped away her final tear and looked straight ahead, not seeing anything
so.. this new life is in fact for free?
Yes, I added, It's a gift from Him for you
We spent all evening talking about this subject
And since quite some months I could really see her smile again.

© Warrior of the Light
-- (the girl above is fictional) --

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